If you're anything like me, you look for signs - those small yet profound nudges from the universe letting you know you're on the right path, doing a good job & that everything is going to be okay. For me, those signs have often come in the form of memories of my mom, who I lost suddenly several years ago. Sometimes, in the quiet moments, I can feel her rooting for me, helping guide me along, especially when life feels uncertain. Lately, I've been finding those signs. I’ve been searching for them, but they’ve also appeared without me even asking.
Years ago, not long after my mom passed, I found myself in an abusive relationship. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. I'd already gone through so many big life changes over the span of a few months, and I wasn’t sure if I should just stay and try to figure things out or if I should make a run for it. I remember driving home from my office one day, wrestling with these thoughts. When I pulled down the visor in my car, a key fell onto my lap. I didn’t recognize the key—wasn’t sure what it opened or why it was there. But in that moment, I took it as my sign. My mom’s way of saying, “you need to get out of there. You’re going to figure this out.”
Shortly after, I found an apartment of my own and played midnight mover.
That was the first time I’d received such a clear message. It was a turning point, and it helped me move forward. Since then, I’ve had other keys - literal and metaphorical, show up at pivotal moments when I’ve needed them most. Moments when I wasn’t sure what direction to take. “Should I move the studio? Should I pivot the business?” But just like that first key, these signs always have always arrived when I needed a nudge to trust myself and take that leap.
Looking back, that key wasn’t just an escape route - it was the beginning of a new chapter, one where I’d start reclaiming control over my life, my decisions and ultimately, my happiness.
Sometimes we think we can plan it all out. We fool ourselves into believing we’re in full control of our journey, but in truth, the universe has its way of sending us on detours, offering up challenges and opportunities at precisely the moments when we’re least expecting them.
And lately, I've been feeling those same kinds of signs again. We’re making some major changes at Farmer’s Son Co., and while I know deep down, they are the right moves, it’s been overwhelming at times. After a particularly rough 2023, this year has been all about finding new energy - new life for the business. Just like in my personal life, where I’ve spent the past few years working on healing and moving forward, I’m FINALLY at that place with Farmer’s Son Co.
I want to see it thrive, not just survive.
It feels like I’ve been blowing up parts of the business with dynamite, kind of like those old Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote cartoons. I’ve cleared away things that just didn’t make sense anymore, but at the same time, we’ve had changes thrown at us that we weren’t expecting. The kind that have kept us on our toes. The past few weeks have been full of uncertainty. There have been plenty of moments where I’ve had to remind myself to trust the process, to lean into the discomfort and the unknown. To keep moving forward.
One of the hardest parts of small business ownership is that you rarely get a break. If something isn’t going as planned or if a product doesn’t resonate with your audience, the impact is felt immediately. And as much as I try to separate the business from the personal, it’s still kind of personal. There’s no buffer between the brand and you. Farmer’s Son Co. is more than a business - it’s a reflection of what I want to share with the world. So, when things don’t work, it stings in a way that I don’t think many people understand unless they’ve been through it themselves. But at the same time, that’s where the growth happens - in those messy moments of uncertainty and well, failure.
As I head into my ninth holiday season with Farmer’s Son Co., I’m trying to find that balance between excitement and fear. I’ve spent all year carefully crafting plans for what’s to come, but as they’re now coming to life, it’s both thrilling and terrifying. Small business ownership is tough. Everything changes so fast. You’re constantly second-guessing yourself.
“what direction should I take? Will people like this? Is this the right move for the brand?”
It’s a dance between self-confidence and self-doubt.
But as daunting as it sometimes feels, there’s also been this quiet confidence, a calm voice inside me that says, “you can do this.” Yet, I’d be lying if I said there weren’t big moments of doubt, those sleepless nights where I wonder, “can I really pull this off? Will people embrace the changes I’m making?” It’s funny how those two feelings - excitement and fear - seem to go together. You can’t have one without the other.
This year, especially as we prepare for cozy season - our favourite time of year at Farmer’s Son Co. - we’ve been treating the shoppe like a dress rehearsal for what’s to come and where we’d like to take this little studio of ours. We’re taking the best of what we do in our candle and fragrance lab, and we’re building on it. We’re adding new components, things that bring us joy, passions that align with the lifestyle and feeling we want to create for our clients. But even as I write that, I know there’s no guarantee that these new ideas will land. It’s a leap of faith every time, and that’s something I’ve had to become comfortable with over the years.
This holiday season, we’re focusing on celebrating in all its forms. Whether that’s through traditional holidays or new, personal traditions that might seem odd to others but make sense for you and your loved ones. It’s about finding those small moments of joy- those indulgent treats or simple wins that make you say, “yes, I’ve earned this.” We want to be part of your life in those celebratory moments, big or small, and to help bring a little light into your world.
We’ve been quietly transforming the shoppe from a small candle studio into something bigger - a concept shoppe, a modern mercantile of sorts. Along with our trusty candles and handcrafted goods, we’re bringing in a growing collection of specialty and gourmet groceries, premium confectionery and decadent treats. Things that make you pause and smile. Things that elevate those little moments of joy. We want the shoppe to reflect how we want you to feel - taken care of, indulged, and seen. It’s more than just a transaction. It’s an experience we’re creating, a space for people to slow down and savour life’s moments.
Through all of this, I’ve been looking for a sign.
I’ve been looking for something - a sign to tell me I’m on the right path. And recently, those signs have started to make themselves known.
Over the past few weeks, a number of women who knew my mom closely at different stages of her life have visited the shoppe. Some were familiar names, others were distant memories from her childhood or who she’d worked with, but they all came with stories. They knew her not just as my mom, but as an individual with her own journey - friends from school or from different parts of her life. I don’t have many people to turn to who can share stories about her from these different moments in her life, so hearing from these individuals has been incredibly meaningful.
These moments remind me why I do what I do.
These moments remind me why I do what I do. These women - each connected to my mom in her own way - came into the shoppe, shared their memories, and, for a moment, brought her back to me. It gave me a glimpse of who I remember her as, a reminder of her creativity and how much she would have loved what we’re creating here. It wasn’t just about hearing stories; it was a reminder of who she was at her core - her passion, her spirit, and her love for the things that mattered most. It’s been a reminder of who I am at my core - a reminder of what she shared with me during our time together.
For some, it was their first visit to the shoppe; others had connected with me online but hadn’t shared their stories until now. Each of them in their own way reminded me that she would be proud of what I’m doing. Whether these people are her way of sending me comfort or just a beautiful coincidence, I don’t know. But those words “your mom would be so proud of you Dan,” are more than just reassurance; they’re a sign that her love and influence still surround me, guiding me along this path.
It’s a warmth that stays with you.
A warmth that I’ve been searching for.
But the signs haven’t stopped there.
Recently, a long-standing retailer in our city closed, and I learned about an opportunity to acquire some of their fixtures and merchandising pieces that were being disposed of. Some of these were pieces I’d taken photos of years ago, imagining how fun it would be to build my own takes on them into my own space one day. Now, unexpectedly, those very pieces have found their way into my shoppe - and at the perfect time. If that’s not a sign, I don’t know what is.
It’s moments like these, the unexpected gifts, that remind me to keep going, to trust the process.
Sometimes, the signs aren’t always obvious, but they’re there if you look. It’s about believing in yourself, even when it feels hard. And I’ve had to learn that over the years. To pick myself up and keep going, even when it doesn’t all make sense yet.
Running a small business has its ups and downs, but every day I’m reminded that I’m not alone in this. Whether the signs come from my mom or the universe itself, they’ve shown me that I’m on the right path. And for that, I’m incredibly grateful. This journey of change hasn’t been easy, but it’s been necessary. And sometimes, that’s what growth looks like - messy, unpredictable, but worth it.
So, as we head into cozy season and the holidays ahead, I invite you to join me in celebrating the small wins, the big changes, and everything in between. Because at the end of the day, it’s these moments—the messy, beautiful ones - that truly matter.
Cheers,
Dan
